i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
