Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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