Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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