help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
