im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Randomize
