I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
