Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
