How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
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