i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
