i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Randomize
