You can't special order awesome
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
The uberlube is also flammable
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
