He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
