worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
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