I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
