Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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