our cab driver is having phone sex.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize
