too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
