i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Randomize
