Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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