do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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