i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
