She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
