Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
