i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
