I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize