Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I just googled if crying burns calories
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
