Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
