sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize