Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
