I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
