I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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