Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
