I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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