That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
