Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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