If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
