My brain says no but my pants say off.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Randomize
