she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
