i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Randomize
