Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize