i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
nutella sex= disaster
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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