but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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