she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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