i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
