Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
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