dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
