sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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