Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
