Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize