hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
