is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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