So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
